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VII
A rich man, and settled in business, John Lummox concluded that he would marry Mary Bike. With that far-sighted logic which had always characterized him he reasoned that, having first met her on a liner, he would find her again on one if he took passage to Europe. He did--but she was down on the passenger list as Mrs. Edwin Wraggles. The result of their interview was given to Mrs. Bigsby by Dan`l Borem in his own dialect. "Ez far as I kin see, it was like the Deacon`s Sunday hoss trade, bein` all `Ef it wassent.` `Ef ye wasn`t Mrs. Wraggles,` sez Lummox, sez he, `I`d be tellin` ye how I`ve loved ye ever sence I first seed ye. Ef ye wasn`t Mrs. Wraggles, I`d be squeezin` yer hand,` sez he; `ef ye wasn`t Mrs. Wraggles, I`d be askin` ye to marry me.` Then the gal ups and sez, sez she: `But I AIN`T Mrs. Wraggles,` sez she; `Mrs. Wraggles is my sister, and couldn`t come, so I`m travelin` on her ticket, and that`s how my name is Wraggles on the passenger list.` `But why didn`t ye tell me so at once?` sez Lummox. `This is an episoode o` protracted humor,` sez she, `and I`M bound to have a show in it somehow!`" "Well!" said Mrs. Bigsby breathlessly; "then he DID marry her?" "Darned ef I know. He never said so straight out--but that`s like Lummox."
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